Friday, February 4, 2011

"Baby Poop"

“All new parents develop an unexpected interest in bowel movements and baby poop.” Uh yes. This was the first sentence of an article I saw on the website -WebMD…as I was looking up some information on baby poop.

Yup! I’m a mom now! Bowel movements, the color of snot, diapers, and puke…great topics of conversation. When I was without a child, I couldn’t stand being around mothers of young children.  I thought they were plain crazies. I knew if I ever became a mom, such conversational topics would not come out of my mouth. Baby showers made me cringe and I had only attempted to change one diaper in my life…and he peed on me, which left me screaming and scarred for life.
And then I had a baby. I literally began talking about poop since the second my daughter was born.  You can’t avoid it. In fact, the hospital wanted me to document the color, the consistency, and the number of movements per day! I was in shock and horror. But wait…not only did I have to adjust my brain to now include documentation of bowel movements, but I also learned that babies projectile poop. The first time this happened, I about fell over. Nevertheless, I learned and grew quite comfortable changing diapers and catching shooting poop!
Soon I became acclimated to all that related to bowel movements….AND THEN my daughter started eating solids. Oh crap…now I had to amend my understanding once again.
What’s worse is that I know this will be a main staple of my conversational repertoire for several years to come. Even once kids are potty trained, it seems they still need help wiping. Dear Lord, help me.
Motherhood brings such new and exciting challenges. But it also brings poop or should I say, “poopy doopy.”
On top of accepting the fact that I’ve become what I vowed I never would, I’m learning how to successfully work full-time outside my home and still give all of me to both my daughter and my husband. The balancing act of new mom and working full-time is leaving me literally and figuratively pooped! And I wouldn’t have it any other way.


  1. My mom takes care of my little guy during the day. I leave a report sheet for her to write down when he ate and how much, when he napped and how long, and if there was a poop. This has evolved into lots of fun poop descriptors. Monday was a Gargantuan poop, Wednesday it was a Mammoth poop, and today the sheet read one poopola, two poopola...

    I'm always so happy to hear it's happened because I know nursing is going well and all his plumbing is working. Three cheers for mommy-talk!

  2. Too funny. It is so obvious you're a teacher!!

  3. Love the "poop" talk! Wait until she starts showing an interest in potty training...and realizes that she does NOT want a dirty diaper on her but and takes it off, in 2.5 seconds and brings it to you! Yes, that is SO much fun right now! :)

    Also, Andrea: those poop descriptors are HILARIOUS!!! :)